Category: Cluebat

September 20, 2007

Yeah, I’m Still Here

Ut Incepit Fidelis Sic PermanetI don’t blame some of you for wondering. It’s been (what, a month now?) quite a while since I had the time to sit down and shoot my yap off about anything. Kind of lousy that such a thing had to happen right in the middle of a provincial election campaign, especially with Dolt McGuilty in such dire need of getting what’s coming to him.

But living takes priority, right? The new job has been eating up what time and energy I have, so that’s where my efforts have been going. Don’t worry, though; I’m back and ready to spew about my favourite peeve of late: MMP.

The bullshit brigade that’s been peddling this prattle as if it were holy scripture will tell you that that stands for “Mixed-Member Proportional,” as in “better democracy than we have now.” Bullshit. I know what it really stands for: More Machiavellian Politicians.

Utter BullshitHere’s the way it’s supposed alleged to go: some proportional representation means that people who wouldn’t get a voice in Queen’s Park under the current first-past-the-post (FPTP) system will now get a voice equal to the amount of the vote that they get. Get 10% of the popular vote, get 10% of the seats set aside for MMP. Real democracy in action. More Power To The Peopleâ„¢.

Yeah, right. I’ve ranted about what a bad idea this is before, originally back on the 19th of April. For those of you that might have missed, here’s the way that it’ll really work:

Instead of electing 107 MPPs to go to the Arsehole of the Universe® to represent the interests of their local constituents, we’ll only get to elect 90. Another 39 widget-herders (making a total of 129; 22 more political leeches than we already support) would be picked not by such unwashed types as you and I; they would be picked by their parties. That’s right; they’d be accountable to the party, not to you!

Besides the erosion of regional representation that is so vital to a province as vast as Ontario (see my previous rant for details), this whole damned thing stinks of the kind of cronyism that makes Adscam® look like a minor boo-boo.

Think about it: those 39 bozos looking to clamp onto our collective taxpayer teat would be picked from lists drawn up by the parties. No party can be trusted with that. No, not even the Conservatives (and I’m a card-carrying Tory!).

Get a friggin' clue, alreadyAHA!!” the moonbats shriek. “Even a conservative doesn’t trust the Conservatives!” Please do piss off.

This has nothing to do with whether or not any one party can or can’t be trusted. It has to do with understanding human nature. Whereas leftbots tend to see the human species through rose-coloured coke bottle bottoms, we conservative types take a more realistic view. We also actually pay attention to the lessons of history. These lists that the MMP MPPs will be pulled from will be filled with nothing but failed candidates and party hacks. Can you say “cronies,” boys and girls? Try practicing it in front of the mirror if you have trouble.

RantsBut that’s not the end of it. Experience in other countries has shown that a system like that makes small fringe parties breed like rabbits on viagra in a vaselene factory. Under the scheme being proposed, a party would need to get 3% of the vote to get one of the MMP freebies.

Think about that; that’s fewer than one in twenty. While you’re at it, think about 20 people that you know. No, it doesn’t matter who, just think about any twenty people that you know. Guess what? At least one of ’em’s a kook. And if you’re thinking about 20 people and can’t figure out who the kook is… it’s you. Do you really think you want to give the clowns a say in how the circus is run?

Yeah, I'm on a roll...Hey! Come to think of it, I’ve been underrepresented… While there isn’t a politician in Ontario that has the guts to come out and say it, I know damned well that I’m not alone in thinking that it’s high time that Ontario got a conceal & carry law! You know what I’m talking about: the kind of law that allows law-abiding folks with no criminal record to arm themselves. Everybody knows that the scumbags aren’t worried about cops or courts, but they’re damned well scared shitless about bumping into somebody like me with a .44 (or better yet, .50 cal) Desert Eagleâ„¢ tucked into a shoulder holster that won’t think twice about saving the public some money if given an excuse. That’s saving money as in not having to pay out a shitload of my tax dollars to pay for your lawyer and then house and feed your worthless ass for the next 20 years or so. All that stuff’s expensive; ammo is cheap. Sort of.

No politician will admit it but when decent folks are alone in that voting booth, you’d be surprised how many of us are itching for the chance to see the shitbags of society shaking in their boots for a change. Damn… the Blow A Gangbanger’s Brains Out Party® could end up with 39 seats in Queen’s Park!!

Hm. Come to think about it, this MMP thing might not be so bad after all. Please disregard this post. Except for the last three paragraphs, of course… 😉

August 26, 2007

Farmer Bob Not Rolling Over

OFAHWell, I guess we can just file this one under “Well, DUH!” and move on from there, eh? Anybody who comes here regularly (and has two brain cells to rub together) already knows damned well just what I think about the Farmer Bob Varmint Gun Registryâ„¢. Specifically: we don’t have a gun control problem in this country, we have an asshole control problem. Locking up criminals reduces crime; hassling the shit out of farmers and duck hunters doesn’t. End of argument.

About twice a month or so (more often when I put up a post like this one), I get the usual, snarky email from some anti-gun Froot Loop, accusing me of everything from pro-Americanism a’ la the Second Amendment to plotting the assassination of all things cute and fuzzy. These little tirades invariably end with the assertions that I’m a) the lone voice in the wilderness with whom no one else agrees, and b) crazy as a shithouse rat.

Nice folks, huh? The problem — for them, anyway — is that I’m neither wrong, nor nuts, nor alone. And even the MSM is starting to agree. Laura Czekaj had a bit of an interesting writeup in the Ottawa Sun today, telling us that “Many flout firearms registry laws say experts“:

In neighbourhoods across the city, people are flouting the law by storing unregistered firearms in opposition of the federal gun registry.

No! Impossible! Not in Ottawa!! 😯

It’s impossible to tell how many people have opted not to register their guns with the Canadian Firearms Registry, but police and members of the firearms community get the sense that there are many gun owners who subscribe to this passive form of resistance against the controversial registry.

Impossible? No, it isn’t. As a matter of fact, I can tell you myself: it’s about four out of five long gun owners!

“On the whole, we do have records and people have registered firearms, but there are always firearms out there that we are not going to know about, registered or not registered,” said Sgt. Anthony Costantini of the Ottawa police guns and gangs unit.

Um… weren’t we told that having the registry would mean cops would know? About the registered ones, at least? 😕 The Grits didn’t lie to us, did they??

It becomes a concern if police are called to a residence and are confronted with someone carrying a gun, which officers didn’t previously know was in the house.

“But until you are confronted with that, you will never know,” said Costantini. “It’s like walking into a situation where you don’t know what’s behind the door.”

Um, guys? According to the cops that I know, EVERY call is like that: you don’t know what’s on the other side of the door. That’s where that whole “hope for the best but prepare for the worst” thing comes in handy…

It was that exact situation that played out in a Woodroffe Ave. home on Wednesday when Gatineau officers executed a court order to retrieve 14 registered firearms from Siva Yogi Shanmugadhasan, 48, and discovered additional guns that were not properly registered. Ottawa police were called and the weapons were seized.

Shanmugadhasan is facing several weapons-related charges, in addition to being the subject of a domestic dispute investigation that led Gatineau police to his door.

The weapons seized from the house included AK-47 and AR-15 assault rifles and an array of inoperable guns, such as a grenade launcher and handguns.

Ah, yes, the obligatory references to the top favourites of the anti-gun hit parade. Nothing scares the bejeezus outta the city folk like a reference to “AK-47 and AR-15 assault rifles.” And hey, how can you have an article about guns without trotting out the Domestic Violence Boogeyman®? You can’t, right?

We’ll cut Laura some slack here. After all, she’s writing for an Ottawa newspaper. There’s just a few little problems with this little bit of slight-of-hand…

Which one is it?Lie#1: the AR-15 is an assault rifle. No, it’s not. The M-16 (which is also based on Eugene Stoner’s design) is an assault rifle but the AR-15 isn’t. Yes, the ’15 looks like a scary piece of hardware, but the anti-gun crowd, and the MSM in general, rely heavily on the fact that most of the general public haven’t got the foggiest idea of what an “assault rifle” actually is. Don’t believe me? Alright then, smartass, take a look at the picture on the right (click on it for a better look) and tell me: which one is the “assault rifle?”

Go ahead, take your time; I’ll wait. I’ve got the time.

Okay, think you’ve got it yet? Which one did you choose? The top one? The bottom one? That’s what I thought. Would you like to know the answer? The answer is that neither one is an assault rifle. Nope, not either one; neither one. All those are are just a couple of little ol’ .22s. Sure, they’re all gussied up to look all big and bad, but they’re still only a couple of .22s, just the same.

Lie#2: there are no Kalashnikovs in Canada. This is also bunk. There’s one (Chinese made, I think it is) sitting in the display case of my local gun shop. I think they want about $800 for it, or somewhere in that area… Try actually walking into a gun shop sometime and taking a look around.

Lie#3: there is a quantifiable connection between guns and domestic violence. Sheer and utter bullshit that has grown more and more popular in Canada ever since we experienced our first incident of Islamist terrorism in Montreal. Even if there is a gun in the house, when some woman-beating sack of maggot shit decides to kill his wife, he usually grabs whatever’s closest at hand at that moment: a knife, a blunt object, a cord, his fists… Yes, it’s vile, but it has nothing to do with guns.

COURT APPEARANCE

Shanmugadhasan will appear in court later this week to answer to the charges.

Speaking in general, George Perrin, a member of the Ontario Federation of Anglers and Hunters, said there are many gun owners across Canada who have decided not to register their firearms either as a sign of defiance, or because they’re collectors who have guns that are now prohibited under federal laws.

“There is a fair number of people who have not registered and have refused to register because of the stupidity of it (the registry),” said Perrin.

The Canadian Firearms Registry contains data related to licensed firearms owners and to the registration of all firearms in Canada.

Can we kill that damned waste of money yet? We could have used the cash to build some new prisons…

August 14, 2007

Panhandle This

[This post contains some language and subject matter that is not appropriate for children. Parents are advised.]

RantsI wasn’t going to write anything today; I’m supposed to be on vacation — I figured, since I hadn’t taken any time in over a year and just got laid off, why the hell not? But the crap that I’ve been tripping over in my daily paper is just plain (you guessed it) gettin’ on my nerves.

First, there’s the bunch of lazy shitbags in TO that drank a little too deep of the Entitlement Koolaidâ„¢ and knifed a guy to death when he wouldn’t give them any change. It’s not like no one could have seen this bullshit coming, either; “aggressive panhandlers” have been becoming more and more of a problem in the Arsehole Of The Universe® for years now and every time someone dares to point out the fact that it IS a problem, the argumentum ad hominem flies fast and furious from all the usual suspects in TO’s Homeless Millâ„¢ industry. But for all that, it is still a problem, and the tax-dollar Pac-men know it too:

Earlier this year the mild mannered woman told a committee of Toronto councillors that when she asked a panhandler to leave the Tim Horton’s she owns, the panhandler slapped her across the face and cut her. She says her staff “don’t want to approach [panhandlers] at all anymore.”

AsshatteryAnd before some squawking dildo out there starts in with all the “you’re just a mean conservative, you don’t understand, etc, etc, ad nauseum” bullshit, there’s a little something that you need to know about me. I don’t admit this very often because, quite frankly, I’m ashamed of it but here it is anyway:

I used to be homeless at one time.

That’s right, I lived on the street for nearly a year once. So, before all those self-righteous buggers out there sitting on your comfortable little arses start condemning me as an ignorant meanie, consider for a moment that I just might know one hell of a lot more of what I’m talking about than you do. Or ever will.

No more Mr Nice GuyDid I beg for change from strangers on the corner? Not on your life. I’d rather cut my own nuts off. I didn’t beg, I didn’t steal and I didn’t do dope. I managed to survive, get by, and get the hell out of there, and I did it without any free sleeping bags or crack pipes. There are a whole bunch of misconceptions filthy lies that the homeless industry (and don’t fool yourself: it IS an industry) has perpetuated for years that need to be shot down.

And I’m in the mood for some skeet…

Utter BullshitLIE#1: They’re victims of circumstance
Bullshit. The vast majority of these buggers aren’t downtrodden victims of a heartless system; they live on the streets because they choose to! Yeah, you read that right. They choose to live on the streets because, on the streets, you can do whatever stupidity you damned well please; the bar is so low that you don’t have to worry about disappointing anybody, not even yourself…
Wanna spend your days stoned stoopid, doing bugger all? No problem. Anybody that points out what a screwup you’re being is just an asshole that “doesn’t understand life on the street.”
Wanna rip something/someone off? No problem. They have something you don’t, so they’re better off than you, so they can spare it. Besides, if they really wanted to keep it, they’d have locked it up better. And if they don’t hunt you down and stomp a mudhole in your ass for it, well, that just shows what suckers they were to begin with.
Feel like banging/getting blown by half a dozen chicks today? No problem. Their expectations are just as low as yours and if somebody points out that they’re being slutty, they’ll get condemned for trying to stifle the poor girl’s sexuality, complete with the full “it’s my body, blah, blah, blah” rant. Throw in a “Patriarchal Oppressionâ„¢” reference for good measure.
Feel like kicking the shit out of someone that pissed you off? No problem. The rules are different on the street, don’tcha know? And the pigs really need to learn to mind their own business.

Utter BullshitLIE#2: They’re hungry
Bullshit. When’s the last time you heard of someone starving to death in Canada? I haven’t heard of it either. As far as I know, there isn’t a single God damned city anywhere in Canada that doesn’t have food banks, soup kitchens, a Sally Ann, or some other place to get a meal. Most cities have a shitload of ’em. These assholes aren’t hungry, they’re just sober. And they don’t like it.

Utter BullshitLIE#3: It’s not their fault because they have addictions
So God damned what?? If you’re addicted to something, it’s only one person’s fault: YOURS! YOU are the one that decided to pop those pills, mainline that speed or suck on that glass dick. YOU did that, not somebody else. It’s YOUR fault. YOU dug the hole that you’re in. You say you want help to get off the stuff? Fine. But there’s a couple of things that YOU are damned well going to have to do before I’ll even bother listening to you:
First, you have to damn well prove to me that you mean it. Yeah, you heard me: PROVE IT! Get off your lazy ass and DO something to prove to me that you’re serious because, unlike those soft-headed, social worker idiot types, I’m a little too damned street-smart to take a junkie at his word. For anything.
Second, you — yes, YOU — are the one that’s going to have to do all the hard work. Get that through your head. Nobody is going to fix you; you’re damned well going to have to fix yourself.

Utter BullshitLIE#4: They’re mentally ill
No, they aren’t. The mentally ill make up, by my observation (and I’m someone that would know), less than 5% of the so-called “street people” that you see bugging you for change every day. I can think of only one homeless person that I see regularly in the city of London who is, beyond any doubt, crazy as a shithouse rat. The vast majority of panhandlers are either late teen/early 20s buttmunches looking to score some cash to get high on later, or else they’re middle aged drunks, jonesing for a jug of ale. I know this because I see them emptying out their piles of change onto the bar. Yes, that’s right: I go drinking in the same places that most of you buggers criticizing me would be scared shitless to even walk past, let alone enter.

Utter BullshitLIE#5: They CAN’T get jobs
Small town living; gotta love it… Bullshit. It isn’t that they CAN’T get jobs, it’s that they WON’T get jobs. There’s a bunch of sub-lies that go along with this one: they can’t get clothes, no one will hire you when you can’t shower, there is no work to get. All bullshit. Let’s take ’em one at a time, shall we?
They can’t get clothes… Even in the town where I grew up (population: a piddling 3000), there was a Sally Ann store where you could get clothing for free if you needed it. And not all thrift store clothing is crap, either. I once got a three piece suit and an Armani tie (yes, Armani) at a thrift store, so don’t tell me that there’s nothing there. Getting a pair of jeans, shirt and work boots is a no-brainer.
Showers… Please piss off with this one. I was on the street during one of the most humid summers I can remember and nobody smelled me coming. There are all kinds of shelters, mens’ missions, Sally Anns and other places where you can get shower and even do your laundry. Most of ’em serve meals, too (see LIE#2).
There is no work for them… Again, piss off. There was work to be had, even in the middle of a recession, there’s honest work to be had now. There was a place in London — it used to be down on Marshall Street, I don’t know if it’s still there or if it’s moved — called the “Casual Labour Office.” All kinds of companies, from factories to small construction contractors, would come in every day looking for someone to hire for the day. Some of it was minimum wage, some wasn’t. If you did a good job that day, you might get called back by the same company, maybe even hired on permanently.

Casual Labour opened the doors at 7am every day. The lineup would start forming at somewhere around midnight. To this day, I have no idea how many nights I slept on that sidewalk. There was a stack of flattened-out cardboard boxes that we kept tucked around the corner so we wouldn’t have to sleep on the concrete. When it rained or snowed, we’d move and take shelter in the parking garage across the alley (long since torn down for a co-op), always keeping in mind our numbers in line.

I did that for nearly a year, saving every spare cent until I had enough for first & last on an apartment and a bit to float me until I could find a permanent job. But I did it, and so can they. The difference is that they choose not to. I have a T-shirt that reads “Yes, I have plenty of change, you homeless piece of shit, thanks for asking.”

I wear it for a reason.

The so-called “homeless advocates” aren’t advocates of anything except keeping themselves firmly locked on the government teat. They need these people to look pathetic so that they can keep their cushy, overpaid jobs. The best way to get people off the street is to make living on the street actually suck. That means no free sleeping bags, no free pipes and no spare change. Anything less is being part of the problem.

I was going to go off on a rant about something else, too but this is getting kind of long-winded. I’ll do the rest later…

Let the hate mail begin… Bleep off

July 27, 2007

Gun Totin’ Rednecks

Why, yes, I AM PISSED OFF…  how can you tell?Well now, isn’t this ironic? According to two recent articles on CKNX’s website (CKNX is the local station in Wingham for you folks that are “from away”), the OPP are starting to get their panties in a bunch over local folks deciding to tote around some firepower to keep themselves safe until that murdering sack of maggot shit, Jesse Imeson, is safely in either the hoosegow or the boneyard.

Now, I don’t blame cops for trying to be the level heads in a damned difficult situation but they’re going so far as to suggest that decent, otherwise law-abiding country folk could end up in the pokey for nothing more than exercising what seems to me to be simple, old-fashioned common sense:

[The first article; emphasis is mine]

News
Farm

OPP Say Don’t Carry That Gun

As tensions continue to run high through not only South Huron but many other rural communities, police say its not a good idea to arm yourself.

Ever since the Regiers were found dead in their Mount Carmel area farmhouse, residents have been locking doors and keeping kids close.

And as wheat comes off, some are even arming themselves in combines as they go through secluded areas alone – sometimes late at night.

Sergeant Dave Rektor says that’s not a good idea — noting it is illegal.

He says many times — the person carrying the gun is the one hurt.

Rektor says police are doing everything humanly possible to try and find Jesse Imeson.

Some of that can be seen with officers combing fields and bush lots in various areas through Huron County.

[The second article; emphasis is mine]

News
Local

OPP Discourage Public Arms In Imeson Manhunt

The OPP continue the hunt for triple murder suspect Jesse Imeson and remind the public to be patient and let them do their job.

Many frightened residents namely in the rural community are reportedly “arming up” in the event Imeson should approach their farmhouse.

OPP Seargant Dave Rektor says its against the law and extremely dangerous for a citizen to arm themselves and those indivduals would be held criminally responsible for their actions.

He says police are doing everything they can to ensure the safety of the public while they search for the accused killer.

Rektor says in many cases the weapon ends up being used against them by an intruder.

Anyone with information on the location of Imeson or the 2006 GMC Sierra pick-up truck are asked to call 911, their local police agency or the new TIPS Line at 1-877-584-8477.

Talk about pots and kettles…Utter BullshitEverybody with two brain cells to rub together knows damned well that I respect and support the boys and girls in blue that make a living risking their asses for the rest of us but this is where I call bullshit! Decent folks are gonna arm themselves for their own safety until this asshole is caught and there ain’t a damned thing you can do about it. That’s right, Dave: they’re going to carry guns; JUST LIKE YOU DO!

Quit wasting time and resources threatening decent folks and get back to hunting down that scumbag! You want Farmer Bob to take the 12-gauge outta the combine? Simple: NAIL IMESON! Period.

Rektor is bang-on about one thing, though: if you’re going to arm yourself, MEAN BUSINESS and BE RESPONSIBLE! It really is true that homeowners who arm themselves often find their gun taken away from them. And for God’s sake, WATCH WHERE YOU AIM!! If you end up killing the neighbour’s kid, you’ll live with that until the day you die…

July 17, 2007

What We’re Up Against

Filed under: Afghanistan,Cluebat,Moonbattery,Terrorism — Dennis @ 9:42 am

Militant IslamAnd these are the assholes that Jumpin’ Jack!off Layton wants us to negotiate with?? Thank God that ignoramus prick wasn’t alive in 1939… 🙄 Jerkweed Jack seems to be of the opinion that we can just have ourselves a nice little sit-down with a bunch of medeival skin-stogie-smokers (figure it out) and work out all our little differences over a couple o’ pints.

Bullshit.

These are the same gutless assholes that treated women worse than dogs and hide behind civilians like the gutless shits that they are. There’s a real simple reason why the Taliban and their ilk are relying so heavily on roadside bombs: every damned time that they try to come on out and actually face our boys, they get their asses handed to them.

So what do they do? They hide in their little caves, come out every now and then to plant bombs, and then run away. Oh, yeah… and they try to recruit kids to do the stuff that they don’t have the balls to do themselves…

KABUL — Fourteen-year-old Rafiqullah said the men at the Pakistani madrassa showed him and two classmates videos of suicide attackers. They taught the boys to drive a car and let them ride motorcycles. Then the militants gave Rafiqullah his mission: kill an Afghan governor.

The teenager walked eight hours over the porous border from Pakistan to the eastern Afghan city of Khost, where a man named Abdul Aziz tried to pump up his courage, Rafiqullah said. Aziz gave him an explosives-laden vest and the teen confessed his fears.

“I said I was afraid to carry out the suicide attack and Abdul Aziz pointed a gun at me and said, ‘I’ll kill you if you don’t,’ ” Rafiqullah said while in the custody of Afghan authorities over the weekend.

Oh, yeah; we can negotiate with these buggers, alright. Dickheads. Bleep off

Juma GulAnd it’s not like this is the first time that these gutless shitweasels have tried a stunt like this, is it? Anybody out there remember Juma Gul? Maybe you don’t, but I do. He was only SIX YEARS OLD when the Taliban tried to talk him into blowing himself to confetti around some ISAF soldiers. Luckily for him, Juma may have been born at night (I don’t know for sure) but he sure as hell wasn’t born last night

FORWARD OPERATING BASE THUNDER, Afghanistan (AP) — The story of a 6-year-old Afghan boy who says he thwarted an effort by Taliban militants to trick him into being a suicide bomber provoked tears and anger at a meeting of tribal leaders.

The account from Juma Gul, a dirt-caked child who collects scrap metal for money, left American soldiers dumbfounded that a youngster could be sent on such a mission. Afghan troops crowded around the boy to call him a hero.

Though the Taliban dismissed the story as propaganda, at a time when U.S. and NATO forces are under increasing criticism over civilian casualties, both Afghan tribal elders and U.S. military officers said they were convinced by his dramatic account.

Juma said that sometime last month Taliban fighters forced him to wear a vest they said would spray out flowers when he touched a button. He said they told him that when he saw American soldiers, “throw your body at them.”

[…]

“When they first put the vest on my body I didn’t know what to think, but then I felt the bomb,” Juma told The Associated Press as he ate lamb and rice after being introduced to the elders at this joint U.S.-Afghan base in Ghazni. “After I figured out it was a bomb, I went to the Afghan soldiers for help.”

Why, yes, I AM PISSED OFF…  how can you tell?Here’s an idea for ya, Jack!:
You want to negotiate with the Taliban? Fine. Send your wife to do it. If she comes back alive, we’ll all be real interested in what she has to say.

July 3, 2007

How’d That Happen?

Our SoldiersOkay, the hangover’s worn off and I’m ready to get back to presenting my opinions like a cranky caged ape flinging poop at a gaggle of rubberneckers.

I have no idea exactly how it happened, but here’s how it went:

I got into it with one of those playdoh-skulled peaceniks on Friday night. You know the type; the ones that never met anything military that wouldn’t make ’em open a fudge factory in their Stanfields. This particular twerp was going on and on about how we shouldn’t be Fighting Dubya’s War For Oil© and oppressing the nice terrorists in Afghanistan and all the other usual bullshit. He was also űberpissed about how we were making our soldiers go and fight a war they wanted no part in.

That’s where my bullshitometer redlined. I pulled the emergency brake on his little chatter choochoo and gave him the bad news that service in Afghanistan is purely voluntary for CAF personnel. In other words, if you don’t ask, you don’t go. Of course, he tried to argue that with me (a doomed effort if ever there was one) but when that failed, he fell back on wondering “what kind of person volunteers for something like that.”

And that’s when it happened.

I had a profundity; right there in the middle of the pub. I imagine they’ve probably cleaned it up by now (it was one of those kinds of places) but it still happened, nonetheless…

Rants“What kind of person does that?” I asked, still shaking off the incredulity. “Lemme ask ya something, bozo: do you own a dog?”
“Um, yeah,” he answered, wondering where the hell I was going with that.
“Has your dog ever gotten sick?”
“What the hell does that have to do with anything?” This bonehead clearly had no idea what was coming.
“Just answer the damn question: has your dog ever gotten sick?”
“Well, yeah; once or twice.”
“Did you hake him to the vet?”
“Of course.”
“So you took your sick dog to the vet?”
“Yes, I took my sick f#%!ing dog to the f#%!ing vet, what the hell’s your point?” He was probably wondering if we were having the same conversation by now.
“So you treat your dog better than the Taliban treated women?”
“WHAT?!?!?” Where’s a camera when you need one? 🙄
“If your dog gets sick, you take it to the vet. Under the Taliban, if a woman gets sick, she can’t be examined by a male doctor, only by a woman doctor. But ther aren’t any women doctors, are there? Because women aren’t allowed to have jobs. And even if they could get jobs, they aren’t allowed to go to school. So that woman sits in the house — because she isn’t allowed to leave or she risks getting the shit beat out of her in the streets by the local “guardians of virtue” — with the disease or whatever it is working its way through her, and she either lives or she dies. Period. That’s it. And you can’t get your pissant little brain around the idea that some people might volunteer to do their part to put an end to something like that??”

After that, he quickly retreated back to burbling about colonialism, oil and Dubya until I popped him in the smeller and he went away. Not my proudest moment, perhaps, but one that I won’t be ashamed to share with my son one day when he’s older. (And before some knob out there starts accusing me of “advocating violence” or some other such bullshit, remember that I put a cute little kitten graphic to the right, so that makes it all okay Bleep off)

Because I know, in my bones, something that waffling little snot will spend the rest of his life trying to avoid knowing: Without men like me, men like him are an evolutionary dead end.

« Previous PageNext Page »