Okay, maybe not. I have no idea at all how this ends. I got as far as “You shoulda got Michelle Obama ta be yo’ runnin’ mate, now that woulda been somethin’ strategic and fly” and had to go change my pants. No idea when was the last time I laughed that hard.
… or are crime and criminals just getting outright Goddamned weird these days?
Let’s face it, I always thought criminals (like their liberal excusemongers) were kooks to begin with, but this is getting bizarre, even by my standards.
First, there’s the guy in Calgary, who’s likely to end up responsible for the rest of us being saddled with a National Pooper-lid Registry®:
Cops say a man attacked early yesterday with the lid of a toilet tank suffered critical head injuries.
Last night he was clinging to life while police were trying to figure out why the attack at Cowboys Niteclub happened about 2 a.m., leaving with the man in his mid-20s unconscious on the floor.
[…]
Although the choice of weapon is unusual, Robitaille said he is not surprised by what a desperate criminal will do when motivated to unleash violence.
“It’s an improvised weapon, a weapon of opportunity,” Robitaille said.
“But it’s not a shock, people committed to perpetrating violence will amaze you at what they will (use) to injure another person.”
Charges are pending, he said.
Uh-huh. Okay, whatever.
Then there’s the question, what the hell do you do with a situation like this??…
EDINBURG, Texas (AP) — Prosecutors are trying to decide how to jail and bring to court a nearly half-ton, bedridden woman accused of killing her 2-year-old nephew.
A grand jury on Thursday indicted Mayra Lizbeth Rosales, 27, on one count of first-degree murder and on one count of injury to a child in the death of Eliseo Gonzalez Jr. She previously had been charged with capital murder.
Rosales weighs nearly 1,000 pounds and cannot fit through a door to leave her home, leaving prosecutors wondering how to bring her to court.
It was our way of pointing out all the idiocies of Bill C-68 and the long gun registry and all the other gun-grabber-related buffoonery that has tried to pass itself off as public policy in this country for years now.
We never meant for it to be taken seriously — hell, even we didn’t think that the loopy left could be that damned retarded. But no… According to the Mop & Pail, no less, some of the moonbats are actually taking it seriously:
Public Safety Minister Stockwell Day said the violent attack is a “horrific” incident and his heart goes to the family of the victim.
However, Mr. Day played down the possibility of enacting tough security measures in Canada’s bus terminals, similar to what already exists in airports.
“People should always be open to looking at precautionary measures. But let’s keep in mind that as bizarre and tragic as this is, it is extremely rare,†Mr. Day said.
He also dismissed talk by some opposition MPs of a “knife registry,†saying that millions of them are bought each year simply for kitchen use. He added that there are already provisions in the Criminal Code against crimes and assaults.
[The following post contains language which is not suitable for children. I try to keep the site relatively clean (as clean as a trashmouth like me gets, anyway) but there are times when soft language is just plain dishonest. Parents are STRONGLY advised to preview for themselves before allowing their kids access to this post. Better yet; don’t even let your kids read it at all. -Dennis]
…and walk out with a human rights complaint cash cow. Only in Canada. And guess what else? It’s in uber-leftist British Californicate, no less. What are the odds, eh?
Why, why, WHY can I never be making this shit up??? As if none of us saw this bullshit coming, here’s the gist of it: two shitfaced slit-slurpers shuffle into a club, don’t like what the comic on stage is saying, and haul ass to the nearest HRC to piss and moan and collect a free bankroll. That’s what it boils down to.
The rules change from case to case, as needed to ensure that the accused’s rights are properly violated.
Truth is not a defense.
And now, we can add another one to the list: They have no sense of humour…
A Canadian stand-up comedian will face a human rights tribunal hearing after a woman complained she and her friends faced a “tirade of homophobic and sexist comments” while attending one of his shows.
In a decision released this week, the B.C. Human Rights Tribunal ruled there is enough evidence to hear the case of Vancouver woman Lorna Pardy against Toronto comedian Guy Earle. Zesty’s Restaurant in Vancouver, where the May 22, 2007, show took place, was also named in the complaint. The restaurant has since closed.
But Guy Earle stresses the comments he made last year to Lorna Pardy and her partner at Zesty’s Restaurant (now known as Zawa) were not motivated by sexual discrimination but out of his hatred for hecklers.
In the video, the comedian says he doesn’t “hate anybody based on sexual orientation” but does “hate hecklers.”
HOLY SHIT!!! A comedian that hates hecklers! WHAT ARE THE ODDS OD THAT????? 😯 I wonder what this little Canadian Michael Richards has to say for himself…?
… coming direct to you from the Department of WTF, in the Ministry Of You Can’t Be Making This Shit Up If You Tried, is the latest and greatest in Grit shitskullery. And you gotta believe me boys and girls, when I tell you that this one even caught me with my pants down! 😯
Seriously, it really, really did. And I’m a guy that wouldn’t put it past a liberal to dip his pecker in iodine and wank with number 2 sandpaper because he read someplace that it would be a good idea!
Of all the Stupid Pet Tricksâ„¢ that the Librano$ have been trying to pull lately, this one has simply GOT to take the cake. It’s just so… I mean that…
OTTAWA–Liberals will attempt to turn the tables Thursday on rival parties who’ve ridiculed them for being afraid of toppling the minority Conservative government.
They’ll introduce a motion condemning the NDP and Bloc Quebecois for defeating the previous Grit government in November 2005, thereby enabling Stephen Harper’s Tories to win power.
The motion slams the Harper government for setting back women’s equality rights by cancelling such Liberal measures as the Court Challenges Program and a national child care program.
And it concludes by resolving that the House of Commons “condemn the irresponsible and self-serving actions on Nov. 25, 2005, by the New Democratic Party and the Bloc Quebecois which led to the installation of a government that is hostile to the rights and needs of vulnerable Canadians.”
Yup, that’s right. The HypoGrits are thinking that they can pretend to represent Canadians by introducing a non-confidence motion against… er… the rest of the Opposition.
Stay tuned for tomorrow’s episode, where Steffy slams Jack and Gilles in the House by tabling a motion to have them both declared “a couple of big doodie-heads®.”
It’s a slur that the granola-grinding, tree-hugging, pot-smoking hippy crowd loves to fling at soldiers to this day. The one thing that you’ll never hear from these Leftbotâ„¢ screechers, however, is anything at all having anything to do with the real baby-killers of this world: abortionists and those who lend their so-called “moral support” to this grisly, murderous industry.
Those who read here regularly — or who have even just stopped by a couple of times and poked around — already know damned well what I think of the “pro-choice” crowd: they’re one step down the food chain from whale shit.
Sometimes, though, these assholes manage to astonish even me. Call me an idealist if you want, but I actually do think (or thought) that there are some sick mindsets that had managed to fade from prominence, at least in the western world. I guess I just couldn’t get my brain around just how vile these bastards are. So, when I tripped across Michael Coren’s column today (a weekly habit of mine), my first gut reaction was, “he can’t be serious, can he?” As it turns out, he can…
Margaret Sanger, the founder of Planned Parenthood, was a feminist pioneer and is regarded by the women’s movement and supporters of abortion and birth control in Canada as well as the U.S.A. as a hero.
In 1932 she called for, “a stern and rigid policy of sterilization to that grade of population whose progeny is already tainted.” She referred to black people and immigrants as “human weeds,” “reckless breeders” and “human beings who never should have been born.” She said that the purpose of birth control was, “to create a race of thoroughbreds” and advised her followers that, “We do not want word to go out that we want to exterminate the Negro population.”
I suppose you’re wondering what the hell got Mike on that track of thinking in the first place, eh? Well, it seems that a pro-life publication in the States called “The Advocate” went and did a little digging into Planned Parenthood’s mindset and what they found was just plain disgusting (but, in hindsight, shouldn’t have been surprising for n organization that shared its roots with the American Eugenics Society). They had an actor call a bunch of Planned Parenthood offices and… aw, hell, just read it for yourself:
[Caller]: “The abortion — I can give money specifically for a black baby, that would be the purpose?”
PP: “Absolutely. If you wanted to designate that your gift be used to help an African-American woman in need, then we would certainly make sure that the gift was earmarked for that purpose.”
Caller: “Great, because I really faced trouble with affirmative action, and I don’t want my kids to be disadvantaged against black kids. I just had a baby; I want to put it in his name.”
PP: “Yes, absolutely.”
Caller: “And we don’t, you know we just think, the less black kids out there the better.”
PP: “Understandable, understandable.”
Yup, you got that right: too many blacks in this country, so can we thin the herd a bit? I’ll admit that at first, I was sondering for a few minutes if maybe Mike had gotten a little too deep in the Guinness the night before he wrote the column, so I did some digging. It took a little while (“the advocate” brings up a buttload of results on Google) but I managed to track it down. Their website is here and you can download the latest issue of the mag in .pdf format here.
Now you’d think that in a nice “progressive” organization like Planned Parenthood, there must be at least somebody floating around there who’d take an apparent utter prick like that to task, wouldn’t you? Nope. Not a damned one. Not one single Planned Parenthood office they called told this guy to take his racist bullshit and bugger off. And this from a bunch that decries shrieks their heads off about how anyone who doesn’t buy into their little death cult is some kind of intolerant, totalitarian, misogynistic, patriarchal, oppressive, knuckle-dragging neanderthal.
Take a look in the damned mirror, you sanctimonious pricks. Naturally, you can look for Planned Parenthood to hoot and howl that it’s all nothing but a pack of lies (see the blockquote below) made up by wild-eyed evangelists who want women chained to the stove with a line running to the bedroom. Such a thing could never really happen. Where’s the evidence??? Well…
According to Planned Parenthood of Idaho, a recorded conversation released by a California-based anti-abortion group is not only misleading, but a race-based deceptive tactic.
“It’s an extremist, anti-choice group that has manipulated a 25-minute conversation,” said Rebecca Poedy, executive director Planned Parenthood of Idaho. “It’s not an accurate representation of the transcript.”
“Not an accurate representation of the transcript???” What the hell, bitch?? It’s a Goddamn RECORDING, SHITHEAD! It doesn’t represent anything; it’s an audio reproduction of sounds picked up by the microphone. Period. Recordings don’t represent or misrepresent anything. Transcripts, on the other hand…
Seriously; that’s all it was.
Yup, that’s right. The HypoGrits are thinking that they can pretend to represent Canadians by introducing a non-confidence motion against… er… the rest of the Opposition.
